If you’d like to be a little more Brad Pitt and a little less Edward Norton, it’s important that you don’t settle for a nine-to-five full of paisley ties and PowerPoint presentations. You need a strong, macho occupation to be a true man’s man. Here are a few ideas.
1: Stuntman
Nothing says testosterone like flipping a motorbike over an exploding building while a bikini-clad model clings desperately to your strong, muscled back. It’s Hollywood for everyone else, but for the professional stuntman, it’s just a Tuesday.
2: Distiller
There are only a few people who can claim that alcohol is their job, like distillery workers, grape stompers and wine connoisseurs. Of these options, which is the most manly? Grab your whiskey and get to mixing, because this is the dream job of cowboys and liquor lovers around the globe.
3: Bladesmith
Popular Mechanics once ran an article about a bladesmith, AKA a blacksmith, whose job included making knives that could bend at right angles while also remaining strong enough to slice through a 2×4. Such skill, by the way, is currently held by less than 200 people on the entire planet. If that isn’t the height of cool, manly and meaningful work, what is?
4: Mechanic
The quintessential man’s job, mechanics have come a long way from their days of plaids and plumber-like cracks as they bent over greasy engines. In modern times the title of “mechanic” can hold a certain kind of reverence when one works on the right vehicles, like muscle cars, classic cars or beautifully resorted ’69 Dodge Chargers. Not only is it a macho business, but it’s a profitable one, too. And the girls in The Fast and the Furious seem to like it.
5: Barber
There’s no such thing as a female barber. They’re all hairdressers. If you want one of the few remaining jobs in the world that are exclusively a man’s domain, consider becoming a barber, where scissors, blades and Ram’s Horn 5/8″ carbon steel razors are just everyday supplies you pick up during a trip to the Art of Shaving.
Stop torturing yourself with a job you hate that doesn’t allow you to the man you want to be. The only thing worse than a terrible career is the weakness that keeps you there. Break free of your shackles, embrace your inner Hulk Hogan and find yourself a job where you can belch, scratch and flex to your heart’s content.